The Last Five Years

It’s my 5th year anniversary “back” in D.C.! I fell in love with this city a long, long time ago as an American University transfer student in 2007. We had a quick love affair, and I left for California in 2008, until 2010 when I returned and have remained for the last five years. It’s cliche and overused, but it’s crazy how quickly time flies.

But the last five years have included other things besides my love (and now, sometimes hate) relationship with this town. It includes the solid relationship with my boyfriend and #LOML, D. It includes the long resume I’ve built of awesomeness (yes, I’m tooting my own horn). And it also includes the personal growth I’ve gone through that includes dark and sunny days. Quite interesting how much “stuff” a person can cram into five years.

This 5th year anniversary has more meaning than the ones previously, and I expect more than the ones in the future. I imagined myself in five years to have it all “figured out”. I dreamt that in five years my picturesque life would come alive from the corners of my dreams. I hoped that my work ethic would carry me pass the finish line and to the top of the “now-shattered” glass ceiling. Well, needless to say I’m sorely woken.

Despite this, I’m doing okay. It’s weird to wake up in the morning though because I’m all about timelines and deadlines. It’s my semi-Type A personality. I like checklists, and the satisfaction I gain from checking something off is my crack. But what do you do when you get to the end of your timeline and haven’t gotten to where you had hoped? That’s the million-dollar question lots of individuals face everyday. I don’t know the answer.

I hope one day I’ll be more than “okay” with the last five years passing me by, and feel fulfilled with the “stuff” I’ve been able to cram in it. It may not be all that I dreamt of but hey, life is a journey. Maybe the next five years will surprise me, and this is why this 5th year anniversary is meaningful. It’ll be the anniversary I will take on a new mantra and proudly proclaim, “let it go.” (Elsa gets me.) Let go of the self-doubt, self-judgement, and self-criticism. I’m taking this next ride California-style; carefree and worry free. So here’s me giving my last five years an applause, my five-year timeline the middle-finger, and my next five years a high-five.

‘Til the next time.
– E